Monday, September 20, 2010
Mateo Owen Perkins Walsh and Joaquin Lamont Armendariz Walsh!
We were surrounded by a courtroom full (and I do mean full) of precious friends today as the Judge legally recognized our little family. You know it's good when the Judge and attorney are fighting back tears unsuccessfully throughout the proceedings. I woke up today thinking I didn't feel much different. But now, if it's possible, what I do feel is even more in love with the children God chose for me and more determined to honor their biological parents by providing them with a safe, stable, full childhood. A wonderful friend and fellow adoptive parent said it perfectly today, "you are mourning the loss in your babies' lives while rejoicing for being the chosen mommy". Exactly.
As I raced around the house trying to get the three of us ready this morning, my sweet little Joaquin brought to me a picture of my grandparents (the same grandmother that shares his middle name)and just handed it to me quietly. As I looked at the picture, I thought about the way that they loved our family. They weren't perfect but they loved us perfectly. As a child, I never ever doubted that I was loved by both my parents and my grandparents. I knew it through their words, their actions and the way they chose to spend time with me. I want that same legacy for my children. Some people say that our loved ones in heaven can see what happens here on earth. Today was the kind of day, I really hope that's true.
Saturday, September 11, 2010
My sweet lil M just hopped out of bed despite my threats to the contrary. I was about to lay into him about listening and following instructions when he said, "Mama, in a country on the other side of Earth, there was a lot of rain and it flooded in the street and the people had to carry the kids on their backs so that they wouldn't drown. And now, they can't find their houses!" He took a deep breath and stared at me to see my response. My frustration at his lack of "staying in bed" dissolved instantly. My wonderful, compassionate boy was cozy in his bed thinking about kids without homes thousands of miles away. I am so incredibly proud of him and it breaks my heart to think that just a couple years ago, he and his little brother would have fit that description.
His class at school has been talking about the needs of people around the world and the kids are encouraged to think of ways to help. I can't begin to express how thankful I am for his school, his genuine spirit and his sense of compassion for people who are hurting. It's so easy to forget those things when he's running wild, pushing his brother or not listening to directions. Sometimes the sheer volume of words that come from his mouth on a daily basis is exhausting but I need to be careful to hear him even at his most verbose. Even Jesus told his disciples to let the children come to him. He wanted to spend some time listening to them, blessing them and loving them. I sooooo want to learn from that.
I need to remember that listening is the most profound thing I can do for my kids. I was so close to raising my voice and firmly leading him back to bed without listening to the concerns of his heart. If I had done that, I would have missed such joy at the thought of who he is becoming. My prayer is that I will remember this lesson the next time I start to react before opening my heart and my ears to listen.
I think we'll spend some time tomorrow figuring out what we can do to help the families effected by the flood in Pakistan this summer.